Obviously, any resemblance between President Dumpster Fire and any person living or dead inside is purely coincidental. We just need to get that out there. It has been disclaimed, and with the royal we to make it sound official.

Also, sometimes fire just burns like that naturally—sideways across the top of a dumpster. The flames are not covering up any spots in which other flames have stopped burning since it is an older dumpster fire. It may just look that way.

Anyway, I figure this disclaimer should be enough to keep angry people off my back. I don’t want to be Kathy Griffin’d up in here. I have a long and illustrious career as a self-hosted web cartoonist to protect, and I’d prefer not to alienate any potential sponsors (Nike, are you reading?). However, should reactions instead applaud my work as brilliant satire, I’ll change my position to “Inspired by the Amazing True Story.” This is a very flexible policy position entirely based upon the approval of others.

Like Joe, I’m looking outward filled with hope and expectation while my peers laugh at my innocence being crushed! More to come!

See you all in two days!